Wow it’s been a damn JOURNEY in India my friends.
I never in a million years expected to fall in love with an old friend while doing the yoga training.
And after two and a half months later I finally made the difficult decision to leave him so that I can dedicate myself to pursuing my dreams of becoming a self-employed creative/ artist.
This brief and intense relationship taught me so much about what my ego is like and who I am – what I like and don’t like, what kind of life do I want, what kind of partner and relationship do I want, etc. And just when I had confidently told myself that I was done with “finding myself in relationships”, life reminded me that maybe I’m not as sure as I think in the things that I want.
I do believe that self-discovery and self-realization is a life-long journey that never really ends, but each year I am at least becoming more and more sure that I want to be an independent, free-spirited, creative outlet for sharing my ideas, thoughts, and feelings. And I fully understand and accept that it will be quite challenging in the beginning before I am able to establish myself as a self-sufficient artist, but I am just not going to run away from or procrastinate on working towards my dreams because of this fear anymore.
I’m grateful for everything that happened since I came to India, I feel that now I have more courage, self-confidence, and discipline to actually achieve my goals in life. And a little bit less confused of what I want in life than before. Still confused as hell of course but hey at least it’s progress
I really hope to share more of my writing, art, music, etc. with you in the future. I choose to keep believing in myself and my creations, do whatever boring but necessary things I need to do in order to make my dreams a reality, and most of all, enjoy the ride and be patient with the process.
Wish me luck. Namaste everyone